I Quit!

(sorry this might get wordy. I warned you!)

So, this is how it all went down...

• We found out that we were expecting Lovely Babe 2 on a Thursday
• We told our families that weekend (at my family's 50th reunion no less!)
• I walked into work on Monday morning to put in my 2 weeks notice. 

We've made the decision that, for our family, I'm going to stay home.

It was the right decision and it was definitely time. The anxiety that I felt about telling my employer that I am pregnant again was enough to drive that message home for me. I didn't post about it at the time because I was to much of a mess, but my job as a female chemist and my first pregnancy DID NOT get along.

During the first pregnancy, I was afraid I was going to lose my job or be forced to work in an environment contaminated with documented reproductive hazards - on large scales. I was forced out of my group because they made claims I wasn't being productive and wasn't working 40 hours a week.  All completely untrue, but what they were claiming could have cost me my job. They didn't want to work around my limitation mandated by a company health assessment. After being forced out of my lab group, they had nowhere to place me because of hazards. They attempted to move me to a different lab without a health assessment, and told me about it the morning that I was supposed to transfer. I finally had to get HR involved and threaten to contact a lawyer. Then, when I came back from maternity leave, no group wanted to work with me because of the terrible rumors about me. I had to fight for my job and reputation while caring for a newborn, breastfeeding/pumping at work and being completely sleep deprived. Pumping at work was a large hurdle, because I would "disappear for large chunks of time" for no reason. And I continued to catch crap about having to leave early to get a sick Firefly from daycare.

I had been passed over for at least 3 promotions, denied raises and bonuses. But there was not much I could do about it because it was a she said/she said situation.

Anyways! that anxiety left me with a feeling of peace about our decision. So I walked in and gave my resignation. Unfortunately, my immediate supervision is a very good friend and I have worked with him for almost 4 years. There were tears his not mine, seriously and hugs and sad faces, for 2 long weeks. And there have been sad face messages since. I do miss our daily half hour coffee breaks every morning, but morning cartoon time more than makes up for it.

So far, quitting has been a wonderful decision for all of us. Now if I could only get a handle on this morning all day sickness...

Motherhood and Working

Everyone asks how the baby is and how I'm adjusting to motherhood.  Well here's the truth.

We came home from the hospital with our Firefly and the household fell into a routine of sorts.  The puppies loved him (or at least tolerated him as long as they went outside often), the kitty was terrified of him and mommy and daddy were getting by pretty well with the little sleep we received.

The house work was actually getting accomplished better than before baby and I was back in the gym.  Everything was going really well

Firefly - 1 Month

And then I had to go back to work...

Please some one tell me how you do it all?

We're lucky that Husband is able to stay home with him until July, but I already feel overloaded.  And I know it will just get worse when Husband starts his residency.  As an intern we're expecting his first two months to work 60+ hours a week (hopefully it will get better then).  So I will essentially be doing it all on my own for a couple of months.

Right now I don't feel like I have time to go to the grocery or run errands, do the laundry and lets not even think about working out because I wouldn't get play with or see him.  That's just not fair to him.  I get home, feed Firefly, play with him for hopefully an hour or two and he goes to bed.  Then I have to take care of the milk and pump equipment from the day.  I might get a chance to do the dishes or make dinner.  (Thank God for protein shakes because I would surely starve!)  I go to bed only to wake up at 4:30 to do it all again.

I don't really feel like a mother.  I'm just marking things off of my to do list every night.  I love what I do, but its just killing me right now.

So I ask you, how do you/have you done it?

Conversation in Which I Kept My Mouth Shut...

...in order to keep it work appropriate and allow two fathers to remain clueless.

This honestly happened to me the other day, and please don't ask how they got on this topic; I started listening after the damage was already done.

---------- the gist of it ----------

My Cube Neighbor and a co-worker were discussing their teenage boys (maybe 14-15 year olds) and how they go through so much body wash. Tons of it!

They are constantly buying it. They have to be the cleanest boys ever!

source

The national body wash of teenage boys everywhere.

Just go sniff a high school...

Co-worker said, "yeah it doesn't help that he has to take multiple showers a day. I woke him up to go shovel the driveway and he jumped in the shower." He said he asked him, "what'd you do that for when you going out to work and he just blew me off!"

---------- end topic ----------

In an attempt to NOT GO THERE with these clueless fathers I turned back around to my computer, but I really wanted to ask them, are you serious?

Are they so detached from what it was like to be a horm*nal teenage boy that they have no idea?

I was just screaming in silence, wanting to tell them exactly what their boys could be doing with copious amounts of sudsy soap. Alone. In their shower. First thing in the morning. Multiple times a day.

Alas, I let it slide so as to avoid all of that awkwardness and allow those fathers to remain blissfully unaware that their boys are growing up.

The Come Back Award

I'm Back!

It has been quite a while my dears, but I'm making my come back.

A lot has happened during my little hiatus. I'll try to update you as much as I can a little later.

First I thought I'd share a little celebration with you all!

As some of you know, around the time my hiatus started I started a new job. Its still a contract position with the same company, but its long term and the best place for me to be in this economy. Well that was (I can't believe I haven't blogged in this long) almost 3 months ago.

I had my 3 month review last week. With an ata boy girl and an few everyone is thrilled with you comments I went on my way.

I thought I was all in the clear until yesterday when I got a calendar invite for a 'brief discussion' with the boss lady bright and early this morning. I started panicking. I walked upstairs right on time and the boss man from company headquarters is there. *really starting to panic now. The conference call starts with on of the vice Presidents... * hyperventilating And the voice on the phone is congratulating me?

The boss lady nominated me for the Superlative Service Award! Complete with a pin and a $50 check!

The lesson I learned today... Don't sell yourself short. Good things can happen to you when you least expect them.

Its nice to get out of my funk and get back to all of you! Thanks for sticking around!